handstories

singing to myself

    This is turning into a wild ride.  Pushing through the unknown, creating connections, intersections, and responding along the way.  A bunch of unstitching happened, and I loved the flashes that led to them.  When the ways through showed themselves- light bulb moments.  There has been lots of "what if-ing"...in how the moon garden might grow, and where that wandering black line might go.  And many sudden knowings- the jar, a rainbow star, and today the name..."Soul Song".

    Days are flying by.  This year I'm especially loving the kindergarten and first graders.  There is a child or two in each of the classes that usually does better with extra attention.  I sit with them, we draw, paint, talk about Frida Kahlo, owls, rainbows, etc.  There is encouraging, managing, and a grabbing of wayward paint brushes as needed.  Some days it feels like a three-ring circus, it always feels like a whirlwind, often with lots to laugh about afterwards.

    It's all connected- why I work with children, this and other cloths, the past, now, and the going...  It's all part of the same story.  I can't quite sort it all out yet, but it feels like it's coming.

Crazy busy

    Ok, so maybe it wasn't a good idea to run out of town for a week near the end of the school year.  There is a lot of scrambling in catching up, keeping up, and scurrying, to get through this last week of school.  

    Moon has had band concerts (with one more performance to go), finals, projects, a first real job interview and training.  (Which begins next week, which required half an hour of finagling to reschedule appointments.  Including the orthodontist, which I had so carefully planned to happen NOT at rush hour again...sigh.)

    K. has much going on at work, and out of town trips being planned. (Plus he has my stress and whining to listen to.)

    Blue is enjoying, and tired, from his new summer job, while trying to squeeze friends into every other spare minute.  (We see him occasionally at meals, or as he goes out the door.) 

    My work has been mostly gathering art from the walls all around the school and organizing it to return to students before Friday.  In my efforts to be efficient, I've taken down (and had to rehang) the wrong displays three different times.  There were some nice moments with my first grade friend, who was not wielding scissors this time, and gave today a thumbs up while announcing that it was a "Great day!"  We colored popsicles and discussed our favorite flavors...blackberry, blue-raspberry, lime, and Pepsi (his, not mine!)

    Tonight we sweated (literally and figuratively) through our family singing group concert.  And, NO, I did not practice while I was away.  And, YES, it showed.  During the final run through, the talented woman who stands next to me asked which part I was singing?  "I have no idea.  Clearly not the right one!"  (She quickly traded spots so her voice could have a better angle into my ear.)  Gratefully, all reviews were lovely.  Our leader, she really is a miracle worker!)

    AND, it's Hot.

    All to say...that I've been knitting on, and finally finished, this hat that was started months (years?) ago, out of old handspun, because it took absolutely no brain cells.

elsewhere

        Today, during the last class of the day, first grade, with one of my very favorite kids, things went awry.  He is often a handful, on the spectrum, and all over the place sometimes, but he cracks me up and I love hanging out next to him.  Today he did not return those feelings at all.  There was a stool up over his head at one point, and then scissors in his fist being shook at us.  He was so angry, and unable, or unwilling, to communicate what was wrong.  The scissors were finally put down, and he was taken to the support room.  I wish we could've understood.

    Moon continues to maneuver through new teenage things.  I wish I could convince him that I do understand.

    Blue is working hard to let us know that he's his own person with his own life now.  Sigh, I wish he could understand how I can be both sad and glad about this.

    Number seven has barely begun, and is now packed up with the other six.  They're coming along with me tomorrow to visit my sister in Rhode Island for a week.  Everyone is this house understands that I'm so very glad for some time away from it all.  There will be some days by the sea...I can't wait.

    I hope you all find restful spaces in the upcoming week.

    Toodle-loo...

    

glittering moons

    I love glitter.  This surprises folks.  (I suppose it might be due to the jeans, gray t-shirt, pony-tail and tennis shoes I wear most days.)  The sparkle of it just delights me... teeny-tiny glints of light.

    Yesterday I was quite giddy over some glitter paint the teacher had given the students.  She commented, "It's so weird how much you like it!"  One of the teachers I worked with last year wandered in as I was going on about it, and recounted the time when I had brought some in to add to the kids' posters.  (Funny, she didn't tell the story with fondness, but rather with exasperation...) 

    Back in the 90's, Janie and I shared a classroom and a love of all things glittery (among many other things).  We each had a container of body glitter for our shoulders, temples, etc.  "Everything's better with glitter!" we would say.  The teacher of the classroom across the way from us felt quite the opposite.  On days that we had the sparkly stuff in action she would come no further than the doorway to talk to us, so as not to track it back into her classroom.

    So, here I am trying to give the illusion of glitter with tiny colorful stitches to these moons.  You need to get really close to see them, but they're there, making me happy!

cool & NOT

    I'm not ready to talk about this one yet, but am considering crystal-ish lines, still figuring some things out.

    So, instead, a funny school moment...

    There is a first grade girl who is full of spunk and sparks, she cracks me up.  Recently she would NOT put her pencil down and listen to the teacher's directions for a particular assignment.  Finally, I came up behind her and slipped the pencil out of her grip.  

    "NOT COOL LADY!"

        "NOT cool to not be listening."

    "NOT COOL AT ALL!"

        "Oh, well."  

    Of course, she was later frustrated because she hadn't listened.  I raised an eyebrow while handing her an eraser.  

    It could've been worse.  I heard that she was mad on the playground one day, went up to the teacher on duty and yelled, "DO YOUR [email protected]*#ING JOB!"

    I'm glad it wasn't me,  I would have had a very hard time keeping a straight face!

Why.

    There are days when a soul wakes up, looks in the mirror, and sighs heavily.  There I was looking back at me this morning.  Tired, old, fat, ugly... all the words came.  And the feelings- of not wanting to go out in the world and be seen.  

    But off to work I went, in my jeans and Goodwill plaid flannel shirt, which seems to be all I want to put on these days.  

    The fourth graders were working on their Basquiat inspired profiles.  (Ms. T. is so great about introducing powerful artists that this community of children can identify with.  She talks to them about making their own choices, telling their own stories and perseverance.)  

    One boy was done and called me over to see his painting (above).

    "Do you know what all of this red part is?  This red pouring over and dripping into the head?  It's all the bad stuff.  The pushing and shoving.  The name calling.  All of it."

        "Is there something in the head that helps to get it out?  The yellow?  The ladder?"

    "Nope.  Nothing works, unless there's an apology."

        "Does someone need to apologize to you?"

    "Nope."

        "How is your day going?"

    "Pretty good."

        "You know what I notice about your painting?  The words you chose to put in your head... Think, Summer of Days, Machine at work, Glory.  Those are good strong things.  The other night my singing group sang "Glory" from the movie "Selma" about when Dr. Martin Luther King and many others marched for their rights.  They were pushed and shoved and called bad names, but they kept on marching and working for what was right.  Your painting makes me think of all of that.  Thank you for sharing it."

    "Yep.  You're welcome."

    I'm so glad I went out into the world today.

 

"The Radiant Child" by Jean-Michel Basquiat 

in & out, round & round

    The art teacher shared the beautiful bold work of Xenobia Bailey with the third graders, and then they wove . . .

    They all began with the same colors, but then went wild with their own ideas.  Some of the yarns were from my stash, including some early handspinning.  It was fun to share some of their stories with them as the students worked.  

    Today I stitched them together for displaying.  I love them grouped together, and seeing how happy the kids were with the results.  "We made that?!"

calorie-free patchwork snacking

 

    Bits of the indigo-ed cloth, Deb's rainbow-ed thread, Jude's invisible basting and paperless piecing were just what the therapist ordered following a wild day at school.  (More than balancing out the peaceful day before.)  It was a day where both the art teacher and I were very glad to have someone to roll our eyes and laugh with about it all.  

    There were a couple of sobbing children (and I mean sobbing, one boy left a puddle on his placemat) over not finishing by the end of class (even with reassurances that they could finish next week).  A few hoarders of colored pencils, kept tightly in their fists, for fear that the pink/silver/purple pencil might never be found again.  Sharpie incidents, the need for fast talking redirections, group yarn tangles . . . you get the idea.  One of those days.

    The lowlight, or highlight (depending on how you tell the story), was a very unhappy student who did not want to sit in a new seat this week, a seat that would hopefully keep others in the class safe from his flying paint brushes, supply caddies, doorstops, etc.  He was escorted out after shouting words that I won't repeat here, at one of us.  They were quite colorful.  We were never quite clear as to which of us they were directed at, but both laid claim to the title.  

    All to say, it was very swell to come home and stitch little bite-sized squares (I'm thinking of them as blue chocolates . . . indigo truffles, perhaps?" *

    Tomorrow is a home alone day!  I'm looking forward to seeing what the morning light brings in way of inspiration for what's next on this piece.

 

*confession- there just may have also been some real chocolate and wine involved in this recovery.

avocado & pine tree green

(His)

    This artist, a second grader, I think. (See, it’s all a blur…), as his class came in, I noticed he had started his usual wandering. He’s not interested in the warm up routine. At all. What works for him is to give him a job.

    Actually, what works best is to ask him for help. He will pass out, wash up, wipe off, etc… if asked. So, he helped me set up, and then was willing to start the assignment (experimenting with color mixing), but it was going too slow for him.  His interest was quickly waning, so I asked him to help me do it, too. “My hands are still wet, can you fold my paper? Write my numbers? My name?”

(mine)

    We had a very good successful time, especially with the oranges and greens.

a scattering of stars, moons & thoughts

    I really love making stars.  

    Back to school today.  A pretty calm day, considering.  Maybe they were all tired from having to get up and get going again after vacation?  After two plus weeks, I'd forgotten how dark it is before 8 am!

    Enjoyed the super moon last night, shivering on the corner in my slippers.

    I aim to write more about the classroom, but honestly, the days are such blurs of activity that I can hardly remember any of the children's names, let alone what happened (one of my weaknesses, which I try to cover with a lot of "Sweetie's").  But more and more there are moments when I get to hang out with someone having a hard time.  This artist was scribbling all over that wolf on the right . . .  

    "Whoa . . .Your beautiful wolf!"

        "It's not working!"

    "Let's find it again and see..."  After some serious erasing, and cheerleading, he came around, and dove back into the assignment, adding the bark marks and the deer.  Moments like this can fill my whole day.