Day One of Spring Break: I think I've quickly, easily and completely slipped into vacation mode. So has my needle.
That pretty pink piece is the work of Heike.
The weariness is beginning to wane, thank goodness. Even my dreams have been wearing me out. Two nights ago I dreamt of crying, of being so-so sad and unable to stop, and waking up with a headache that lasted the day. Last night's nightmares- of murders and a child being stabbed in a fight, picking him up and running for help, he shrank into a baby that was starving, and I had no milk to give him.
There were more dreams along the same lines, but in the last one, I was sadly packing to leave a long ago friend's home, and found a pink silk slip. In real life it was silly, ruffled and over the top, but in the dream I wanted it, thought it was so beautiful and soft . . . After thinking about it all morning, I found some pink silk and started stitching for the first time in days.
Later I read a little of a favorite childhood book, and then went for a walk. Wandering to the library, and then into a funky little gift shop (where the owner loved my handspun/knitted hat and asked if I would make them for her to sell? We both realized quickly that my time and costs were not anywhere near what she could pay me, but it was a nice conversation to have had).
There was a last stop at the wine shop, where I bought a pretty pink bottle of rosé that had a sweet write-up with "rose petals" and "raspberries" in the description. By the time I wandered home, things seemed lighter, and I began filling the little house's "windows" with cheery colors to see the world through.
"They came to the chocolate-colored house . . . It sat like a big plump chocolate drop on the square corner lot . . . The pane of colored glass over the front door shone ruby red in the sunlight." - from Betsy-Tacy, by Maud Hart Lovelace.
(All of these fabrics were dyed by Heike.)
There were a few days of noticing. At Moon's baseball game, a nest atop of the light pole, with baby birds yelling for food. A swooping parent came and went. We think it was a condor. Spotted three rabbits that day, too.
And the day before found a jay feather in the yard, and a little plastic number three off someone's uniform at the field of Blue's game.
The three year old next door brought flowers, and later the six year old across the street came with chives. Then yesterday, just as I was taking the feather photo, a neighbor yelled out, "Don't look at the news!"
Followed by phone calls with family. There are things going on. Which drums up things from the past, and how they layer with the now.
Went looking for the thinnest of thin**.
It's not done, probably it never will be.
Sanity is a very thin thread.
(**most of these cloths are from Heike- love her gentle colors)
The moon didn't quite land where intended.
And not being one who likes to backtrack, sailed into a new vista.
Well, really not so new, more sea and sky. I wonder how many ways there are to look at them?
This tiny vessel just about did my eyes and finger tips in.
(The beautiful golden-orange fabric was dyed by Heike Gerbig.)
I think this will be finished in the next couple of days, just stitching it all together, lots and lots of stitches.
Began as a way to reshape an old lonely sad message, "core" has grown into a collection of community. It is full with the caring thoughts many of you have shared, and the cloths of jude and Gerdiary, ...
...strips and dots dyed with elderberry and tea, from drucilla and the wonder woman bracelet, ...
"core", is being strengthened by the inspirations, talents and friendships of this community, and so am I.
Continued to work on "core".
The original words were stitched, what next? How to amend/mend/change/heal that message? There were sketches and scribbles that, in the end, were discarded. (A thank you to my sister who reminded me that that's not how I work.) I awoke this morning and stopped thinking, picked up the needle, and ideas came into my fingers.
It's changing, letters and words have been subtracted, added, altered, covered with bits of cloth and stitch. The beautiful dark silk is from Gerdiary, and the bit of so soft linen was gifted from jude (reminding me of acceptance, believing and continuing).
Shifting, pushing and pulling, thread and thoughts, into a new belief.